old punks web zine
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Punk Music Reviews, Part VII
Punk Comps/Splits

22 Jacks / Wank (split 7" review) (Time Bomb Recordings): This was sent to me by Time Bomb, the same fellers who re-issued Hell Comes To Your House. 22 Jacks has Joe Sib (formerly of WAX) on vocals and Steve Soto from The Adolescents on guitar. They backed Joey Ramone in the studio when he recorded a song for a Cheap Trick tribute disc. They've toured with the Bosstones, Social Distortion, Goldfinger and the Voodoo Glow Skulls. All this info comes from the promo sheet. Their contribution to this split, "Sky", is a decent slice of driving commercial punk that is reminiscent of Boston’s Moving Targets. Post-Husker Du indie punk with deep, powerful drumming and Southern California power chords. This gets better each time I listen to it.

Wank, from Huntington Beach, was produced by Social D's Mike Ness, who says "I'm not easily impressed. It's not everyday that a band catches my ear. Putting three chords to a melody and not sounding generic is not that easy to do." Their "Larry Brown" could have been an Elvis Costello number off Taking Liberties, when Nick Lowe's influence could still be heard. Very Good.

Time Bomb Recordings seems to be in business to promote new bands and older south-of-Los Angeles HC pioneers Social Distortion and The Vandals. Support their efforts.

Airwalk Guide To Music (CD review) (Interscope): The benevolent synergy of these projects brings a tear to my weewee - I mean eyes. That charitable organizations found time to work together to bring this twelve message revelation to the masses is just so... excuse me... I'm all misty.... Airwalk, manufacturer of skate, snowboarding and active casual footwear and gear that bestows individuality to kids via the sale of millions of $80 sneakers; Interscope Records, a non-profit propagating unheard music to the masses; and of course the bands themselves, who spend their lives Keepin' It Real and insisting on a $5 cover charge, because the kids don't have a lot of money and they refuse to work.

Or, it could just be major corporations scratching each other's asses. Airwalk exists for the profit motive as much as GM or your corner crack dealer. When Individuality is manufactured in lots of 100,000 units and sold at a huge markup, I must giggle because so many breathing mannequins spend all their cash on clothing with a built-in style obsolescence of at best a year. Who has time for personality anymore when attitude takes much less effort and can be bought off the rack?

Back when, skate comps were filled with speed metal and skate punk bands like JFA. This thing right here is middle-of- the-road, cover all the demographics lifestyle marketing. Pretty tame in general. Here's the bands: Possum Dixon, No Doubt, Love Nut, Rocket From The Crypt (sell-outs for a long time now), Red 5, Shufflepuck, Litter, Toadies, Phunk Junkeez, Brian Setzer Orchestra, Polara,and The Young Gods. Released in 1996, whoever picked this up has probably aged up and moved on to the CD samplers at Starbucks and Pier One.

Alkaline Trio/Hot Water Music (split CD review) (Jade Tree): Chicago's Alkaline Trio, the next big thing six months ago, split an EP with Gainesville's Hot Water Music, the great live band whose studio output alternately satisfies and disappoints. They toured together on the Plea For Peace tour, and this seven track disc contains three by Alkaline Trio ("Rooftops" is a Hot Water Music cover) and four by Hot Water Music ("Radio" and Bleeder" being Alkaline Trio covers).

"Queen Of Pain" is a killer Alkaline Trio track, "While You're Waiting" good but average, and the cover is a little harder at the edges but still retains the standard Alkaline Trio pop sense. It's ok. I can see where their strengths lead to a wider appeal, but they need to watch out for complacency on album tracks.

Hot Water Music are poppy and tight, which I prefer over their Screamo and metal psychedelic tendencies. The split with Leatherface also brought them up a notch. Their originals, "God Deciding" and "Russian Roulette", are worthy of repeated listens, and extra credit for the intentionally off-key chords on the latter track. The covers are electrified acoustic and not special. Hot Water Music are all over the map, and my idea of what might make them better is probably the opposite of what their fans think.  I'll bet they also own rap rock records but won't admit to it. They should always split the middle between melody with power. But nobody listens to me. Nobody.

American Fight Club No. 1 (comp CD review) (Outsider): Another disc slipped under my door by either Dave or Dave from Long Beach's Outsider Records. They've updated their web site and it's a veritable monster of capitalism – but only if you buy something, so get to it. Outsider is a street punk label but most of their bands (thankfully) aspire to more than boot stomping and thug choruses. Well, maybe not The Authority!, who can't even give their band a name that isn't a threat. They share the bill with Chicago's Callaghan, Jersey's Hudson Falcons, and Sonoma, CA's The Trend. The Authority! hail from Costa Mesa, CA, carrying on the county's tradition of shows to avoid if you like your teeth. There's a lot of diversity and a wet diaper full of good music to be had with these 28 tracks, and for the most part Dave and Dave have another winner on their hands.

Street Punk. Ok, what does that mean? It's the American version of England's oi. It's working class punk for working class people who, though they may envy the UK's endemic traditions of class and neighborhood rivalries, realize they live in America, the land of freakin' opportunity. No matter what hippies say, our class system is not enforced by law. Street Punks are libertarian when it comes to their own freedoms, and conservative when it comes to other people's problems. They like to unite, fight and get tight. Sing-along choruses are a staple of street punk bands so they can bond with their drunk fans who turn the pit into a war zone. The Authority! are the area's masters of this extreme interpretation of street punk's real world application. The CD opens with a ditty called "Embrace The Hate". I can't make out all the words, and I don't think there's anything or anyone specific they're saying you should hate, but they seem to suggest a general sense of raw hatred is the way to live every day. Another song is called "Marchin’ ime". As in a war? OC is a huge suburbia, and it’s only a war zone if you kid yourself or make it so. The real world of The Authority is a creation of the mind, since Real doesn't always have to be the worst case scenario.

Putting aside their thuggish back-up singing, The Authority! are a talented band. I like how they use bass guitar as an equal of the guitars. "Just Fine" sounds like The Jam's "In The City", which reminds me there are bands who call themselves street punk only to distance themselves from pop-punk and commercially successful bands like Rancid. Callaghan and The Trends could easily fit into the rosters of non-street punk record labels, but the members of the bands must see themselves as street punks no matter how poppy, rockabilly or greaser rock they can be. The Hudson Falcon's cover of Chuck Berry's "Little Queenie" is excellent.

I like most of this comp very much. What I don't get into are generic calls to violence and the sing-alongs that encourage it. Street Punk isn't neo-nazism, and most street punks are probably anti-nazi, but it's hard to see the difference through all the screaming and raised fists.

America Sub-Culture Suck (Comp CD review) (Generalissimo): This is a very cheap ($3.15) CD comp of eighteen bands, all but one from the Washington DC area. The Suspects are the biggest name, churning out the '77 sound they love so much in the Bowery. These bands lost their chance to be on Dischord about fourteen years ago. This is East Coast New School, punk by kids who play in hardcore bands but still take strong sides on the Sammy Hagar vs. David Lee Roth controversy. There's one ska song, a surf instrumental and even a woman singing on one track. Pretty good but not my usual brand of dog food. For the price of a Wendy's Pocket Pita this can be yours forever.

At War With Society (Comp CD review) (New Red Archives): 33 songs for 99 cents. Oi such a deal. It's nice to see an old label still pushing old product like Crucial Youth and Reagan Youth. Also with the UK Subs, Christ On A Crutch, Samiam, Kraut (yikes!), Ultraman, MDC, Snap-Her, Swingin' Utters and others. Lots of thrash and political screaming that should appeal to unwashed punks everywhere. Lots of good memories for old farts who still have a Positive Dental Outlook. This leans toward the old MDC sound of fast, hard and loud with frequent tempo changes.

Back Asswards - Compilation CD review) (Interbang Records): A thirty band/thirty song CD for eight smackers from bands on various labels. A lot of famous power pop punk bands are here: The McRackins, The Parasites, Teen Idols and The Groovie Ghoulies. A majority of the songs have that Lookout sound. The others tread the Fat Wreck Chords waters. A good, cheap comp with artwork that looks like it was faxed to the printer.

Banana Pad Riot (Comp 7" review) (Skull Duggery): Skull Duggery is the next Lookout Records. They also do mail order specializing in power pop and garage/surf. This is a four band tribute to The Banana Splits, a really weird live-action kids’ show from the ‘70s. I haven't seen it since then but I'm sure it's on cable somewhere. I’m guessing these songs came from the show. The bands are Boris The Sprinkler, The Vindictives, Young Fresh Fellows and the Mr. T Experience - all well known power pop punk bands. "Two Ton Tessie" is an old standard, but it's great to hear Joey Vindictive pervert the line "She's big and round, and I love every pound". The other songs are "We're The Banana Splits", "Doin' The Banana Split", and "Don't Go Away". For all I know these don't come from the show, but they do all have the same era-defining Partridge Family/Monkees sound. Boris The Sprinkler does a good job sounding like The Dickies (who do the definitive Banana Splits cover). This 7" isn't too exciting. You'd have to be a real fan to want this. The 7" is also banana colored. Quick! Collector Geeks! To the record store!!!

Before You Were Punk, Vol. 2 (comp CD review) (Vagrant): This might be the most blatant punk novelty ever. What's ever scarier is this brand of foolishness is becoming common. Band tribute albums are opportunistic (while generic old-punk Greatest Hits packages are cannibalistic), but no matter how big the cake, this takes it. Not that it marks the end of the world, but this CD represents the commoditization of punk rock at its cutest. This is bad for street cred but a nice joke for a minute, and fans get to prove yet again how devoted they are by purchasing every fart and belch their heroes record. It's not a bad record but it does beg to be ridiculed as a lightweight money grab.

Here's the songs: What I Like About You - The Suicide Machines, Electricity - NOFX, Space Age Love Song - No Motiv, No Action - MXPX, Our Lips Are Sealed - The Hippos, Don't You Forget About Me - Bouncing Souls, Close To Me - The Get Up Kids, This Way Out - Rocket From The Crypt, Just What I Needed - Gotohells, Bring On The Dancing Horses - Lagwagon, Every Breath You Take - Strung Out, Rebel, and Yell - All.

NOFX contributes a signature-style version of OMD's "Electricity” good enough to make me wonder if more OMD songs have the potential to be recast as punk tunes a la Devo. Most of the tracks are as exciting as you might expect from a project where Vagrant calls up bands and says, "Hey, we're doing a record of corny 80's new wave songs for the Christmas buying season, and you guys are popular right now, so can you think of a popular song people have heard a thousand times, and record it by this Thursday?" The only gutsy choice is Rocket From The Crypt, who take on a great Wall of Voodoo tune. The rest are only as strong as the source material, so you know "What I Like About You" will be as tasty as raw tofu while even a fair rendition of "No Action" makes MXPX look like hardcore geniuses.

It was hard to just listen to this CD because I was taking mental notes on how much any particular band was trying to add their own sound to the old songs or how much they were changing their own sound to accommodate the oldies. So to me this CD was more like a Rorschach test of the band's personality and intelligence. Most of the bands take no chances and make whatever they do instantly recognizable to their fans. The novelty aspects of it are overwhelming. Must… go... listen to something more original than Before You Were Punk… something like A Partridge Family Christmas.

Bite The Bullet (comp CD review) (Know): One of those DIY ultra-affordable comps you'll see in one area but nowhere else. The region here is Orange County and Los Angeles. A combination of some national bands and local ones with connections. 33 songs, including the UK Subs, Electric Frankenstein, JFA, Raw Power and The Suspects. A lot of American street/bar punk and some generic hardcore that couldn't find a melodic hook if it was baited with skunk. Well worth the few bucks but something you transfer your favorite songs off of and then stash away to never see again. It's funny how a clunker here and there can make you not want to leave a disc on the player the whole way through.

Bllleeeeaaauuurrrrgghhh! A Music War (7" comp review) (Slap A Ham): I made sure to transpose the name of this correctly because it’s not on my spell-checker. This 7” is the third in a series (#1 - 41 bands, 64 songs, #2- 52 bands, 69songs, #3- 73 bands, 84 songs) that I’ve bought for the sheer novelty. I’ve listened to each a total of once and don’t plan on doing so again. I’ll probably continue buying these and listening to them only once. I have no idea why but there’s something fascinating about songs that require no talent to play and last from one to nine seconds. Punk bands are accused of not knowing how to play but that’s both a relative statement and a snobbish insult. It assumes if punk bands had the ability to play prog rock they would do so.

The songs (and I use the term loosely) on Bllleeeeaaauuurrrrgghhh! are a freakish punk/metal bastardization of free form jazz where everyone crashes into their instruments with closed eyes and clenched teeth. Even I could do this. I imagine these bands are technically talented but they’ve recorded these blasts of random noise as either 1) a joke, 2) a reason to be on this comp, or 3) they’re Anal C—t fans. I can take A.C. for about as long as it takes to lift the needle off the record. Genres I could care less about – speedcore, death metal, grindcore, black metal, and heavy metal. A lot of Bllleeeeaaauuurrrrgghhh! can be called punk only because there’s no time for guitar solos and clunky stadium riffs.

These comps are fun because it’s what you imagine it sounds like inside a band’s van before it crashes into a wall, or, for the longer (yuk yuk) songs, falls off a cliff before hitting the rocks. Reading the song titles is great because they’re tacked on randomly and usually try to paint a cruel, gruesome image. "The Spazz Triptych", "Victorian Puncture", "Feed On Their Vomit", "Altar To Waste", etc. Giving names to random noise reminds me of minimalist paintings of nearly solid-colored canvasses given titles like “Digression of Principles, #4” and "untitled". With art it’s pretentious, but in music it’s the hysterical icing on the cake.

The single's sleeve has info on the bands, and the lettering of choice seems to be that Death Metal range of fonts I'll call Apocalyptic Cannibal. If you take this kind of music seriously, please seek therapy.

The 4-Squares/The Bollweevils- Carol EP (split 7" review) (Dr. Strange): A 49 cent closeout special and a four song split from two Chicago bands. Mob Town is a great punk rock city. If not for the bitter winters I'd live there in a heartbeat. The 4-Squares are fast and loud, and that's about it. Good for a listen or two, but ... The Bollweevils release records as often as I put a new roll of toilet paper on the spindle. To me these guys can do no wrong. Fast, powerful and Bob's singing style is all his own. Note to self: see The Bollweevils play live.

Bread: the edible napkin - Compilation (CD review) (No Idea #12): a $5 postpaid ($8/2 lp set) comp put together by Var of Gainesville, Florida's NO IDEA fanzine/label/distributor. The last issue came out two years ago and this issue is mostly ads, so for all practical purposes issue #12 is an afterthought/giveaway with the CD. The cartoons by Jason Armadillo are great, a cross between Hate and Tesco Vee. Otherwise there's little stories, some interesting and others without a destination. The CD has 32 bands, most for punks not afraid to wear Van Halen T-shirts and bang their heads when they're not moshing. There's grindcore, thrash and hard-stance emo-core, so much that the other songs come off as unplugged versions of hard rock punk. When I was a teen in the mid ‘70s kids would always say "how could you not like Led Zepplin?! They rock!!" Like ROCK was a higher Zen state of consciousness. Somehow, somehow, I resisted. I'm turned off by anything disco or heavy metal. I don't judge the songs because these genres have nothing to do with me. Listening to this CD I imagined for fans of these bands the worst thing about being hardcore must be cutting off two feet of long hair. Banging your head can't be as much fun without the greasy mop flying around your face. Here's some band names: Serpico, Elmer, Brutal Truth, Sideshow, Lisa Killers, Crunch, and the Bruce Lee Band. May I go now, sir?

Budget Ranch (3- 7" box set review) (Budget Ranch): I can finally use a term I may have made up myself (ok, so maybe I didn't, Mr. Atariblink. Yeesh): MedioCore. As in mediocre ("Of medium and unimpressive quality"). Hey kids, use it in a sentence and it will be yours for life! I recall the mid ‘80s as a dull lull in punk history, and the Budget Ranch box set had something to do with it. There’s three colored vinyl 7"s from Peace Corpse, White-n-Hairy and Pillsbury Hardcore in a numbered, limited edition box set. All that effort was wasted on (here it comes, kiddies!) MedioCore.

Peace Corpse covers ZZ Top and Neil Young songs as if they’re playing them for the first time, and with barely enough energy to successfully pick their own noses. White-n-Hairy are a faux funk trio who cover "That's The Way (I Like It)" with lyrics about donuts. God, why couldn't I have thought of that first? Their other song is a fifth rate Gang of Four imitation. I can imagine them assuring everyone at their shows they’re a fun band. These guys make the Big Boys look like Barry White. Pillsbury Hardcore provide three death rock songs that will kill you with their slowness and dullness.

Making a box set for this is like putting a tiny tuxedo on a turd log. You figure out what that means while I put this back on the shelf to gather another inch of dust.

Built For Speed - A Motorhead Tribute (comp CD review) (Victory): I'm reviewing this because it was sent to me by the nice folks at Chicago's Victory Records. Right up front I must say I have a serious aversion to all hard rock and heavy metal. It goes back to my high school days, were I couldn't stand Led Zepplin-worshipping stoners with their 45 word vocabularies and long girly hair. If I had a nickel for every time I heard "How can you NOT like Zepplin?" I'd probably have 45 cents. When punk first hit you didn't hear any punker admit they liked metal bands (or even Kiss, everyone's closet favorite) like they do today. You were either a rocker or a disco duck. I was a new waver who liked some punk. Music lines in the sand were drawn longer and deeper then. Being a Ramones fanatic I was told I might like Motorhead, metal's version of the Ramones. I tried to get into them but their buzzsaw guitar drove me nuts. I can't take anything metal or disco - ANYTHING. That's how it is being a shellshocked veteran of the ‘70s music wars.

This is a good time to tell you about Elvis Penis. Back when I was eleven I went to summer camp in upstate New York. One of my bunkmates was a fat doofus who did a piece of performance art called Elvis Penis. He was naked, and he'd put his right arm out like he was holding a guitar while his left hand strummed his penis as he did an Elvis imitation. I learned what surrealism was that summer. That's was hard rock is to me - Elvis Penis.

Victory Records is a diverse label with a fair share of hard rocking punk bands. I liked Built For Speed more than I thought I would. Some of the songs are punk without any trace elements of metal, so I was able to enjoy them. Blood For Blood prefaces their pounding version of "Ace Of Spades" with a nicely acted slice of life taking place in a Boston bar. There's this great line, "It's like I tell ya, ya know, guys like me and you, people like us, we're like, ah, royalty in exile, you know, born to lose". The Groovie Ghoulies cover "R.A.M.O.N.E.S." in their usual fashion. The Dropkick Murphys sound less street punk than usual on the still interesting "Rock and Roll", while Electric Frankenstein does their usual shtick on "We Are The Road Crew". Zeke cock-rocks through "I'll Be Your Sister". The other bands are Integrity, Starhead, Chrome Locust, Fahrenheit 451, Terra Firma and Speedealer.

If you like hard rock and punk you should get into this collection. If you're a metal head you'll probably be pissed there's not more guitar solos. Because rock solos rock, that's why.

By The Banks Of The Mighty Santa Ana Vol. II (comp 7" review) (Truk): I'm reviewing this because I bought it for 49 cents and the site needs empty calories to keep it fat, happy and slow. The bands on this four song mini-platter are The Women, Naked Soul, Pinch and Big Drill Car. It starts out well enough with "The Misery Of Your Company", with it's heavy, fuzzy bass and vocals sung through a fuzzy microphone - like a fuzzy Volcano Suns. Then Naked Soul applies some wimpy singing on top of decent mid-paced power pop. Then Pinch's guitarist has to prove he can play fast licks as well as Van Halen. The vocal riff also reminds me of bad cock rock. Finally, Bid Drill Car does a psychedelic number called "Song no. 40", which sounds tight and professional but please, no alternative rock, I'm about to eat. The guitar is reminiscent of Hunky Dory. For 49 cents I've added needed girth to my singles collection. By sheer weight my shelf now screams collector geek. God bless America.

Check This Out Too: Just Another One Foot Records Compilation (comp CD review) (Onefoot): A surprisingly strong comp from a label I've never heard of out of Long Beach, CA. This is a step up from the NOFX-Bad Religion rut most punk kids find themselves in. These bands are more mature lyrically and musically. While you can still point to these two major bands as inspiration, I hear excellent old-style power pop punk as it's done by Samiam, Vacant Lot, the Parasites and others. It's refreshing to hear young bands graduating from stupid snotty childishness. Still ages-show material for the most part but intelligent and powerful beyond the call of duty.

Electric Frankenstein donates a tune and my favorite band is Kid With Man Head. Rounding out the CD are Garage Fuzz, Adhesive, Crank, Pep Rally (sounding like Dag Nasty), Blitz Babies, Lick 57's, The Tie That Binds, Stoned, Gameover, Horace Pinker, Drapes, Latex Generation, Gutfiddle, Migraines (not to be confused with the band that sounds like Sloppy Seconds) and Racer Ten.

Only a few bucks and very well worth it. A rare comp that will wind up in my gym bag for those tough days on the stair machine. Very highly recommended. Hey, maybe there is hope for the future… oh, who am I kidding?

Circle, Circle, Dot, Dot... A Kooties Benefit (comp CD review) (Flatbroke): Amateurish cartoon covers are universally a sign of bad product within, but this started out strong... before devolving into generic ska, idiot- clever punk and a numbnut boot stomper. It was only a dollar.

Blackhead opens strongly with "Redneck Romeo", which reminded me of Sludgeworth. Slappy follows with another Sludge-worthy tune, and then Mulligan Stu kicks in a nice Weasel-esque number. Community Service, Shower With Goats and the Kosmo Kramers followed, and I'm thinking this is the best comp I've heard in a long time. Then songs seven thru eleven end up being ska, which I don't mind per say but the genre is by now too kid tested and mother approved. Ska kids are good kids, so pick it up pick it up pick it up till your ride comes.

Buglite's "What We Had" got me back on track, and The Lexington's "Cars" is decent. No Empathy and The Letterbombs are ok, but then Ringworm reminds me that guys who sing at lower registers than their speaking voice are posers. Then, there's a hidden track that's so stupid and nonsensical to anyone beyond the band's social circle I'm embarrassed to even mention it here. If I knew where it was on the CD itself I'd scratch that part up good.

Only a buck and at least half of it is pretty decent. (flip.. smash..) Next!

A Country Fit For Heroes (Comp LP review) (No Future): I review this because every fuggin' oi and second wave '77 song has been repackaged for suburban kids who were still a future migraine in their parent's heads when this material first came out. The question is: is the demand for this that high, or is this being licensed for a penny a song, so why the hell not? In the bigger picture there's no real harm because most UK tunes from this era are worth owning. It's just funny seeing how many cheap comps with the dumbest possible covers meant to appeal to the dumbest possible consumers get released.

No Future Records put out two of these in the early ‘80s to promote bands not yet making the big pennies and nickels the more popular punk and skin bands were drinking away. Blitzkrieg, The Violators, One Way System and Attak were able to parlay this exposure into future vinyl while the rest went on to lose their teeth through attrition while living in decrepit row homes six feet wide. Not much of this stands out but the bands copy the style of the day fairly well. The Violators sported a female singer who wanted so much for Christmas to be Siouxsie Sioux. Hostile Youth win best yell while Attak not only musically kiss the arses of the Anti-Nowhere League, they manage to leave hickies that still have not healed. I'm kidding - I kid because I love.

Here's some trivia: UK import records back then were packaged in cardboard sleeves half the thickness of US LPs. How this knowledge will help get you laid is not something I can help you with.

Cub/Potatomen (split CD single review) (Lookout/Mint): The Cub fanatic inside me made me buy this even though I own the songs elsewhere. Larry Moreliver and pop-punk producer Mass Giorgini are in the Potatomen, and Larry sings like Ian Curtis or some other epilieptic. Not bad in a quasi-acoustic sense but this review is no more than another excuse to trumpet the greatness of Cub. You can now catch singer Lisa Marr in her new band Buck. That's Cub as pronounced by a dyslexic.

You can read every love note I've written to Cub in the music archives section. It is my fiduciary responsibility to point out that Lisa is the best singer, and that Cub was a pop, punk and garage band. Cub are like The Go-Gos in that their true value to the punk scene gets distorted behind prejudices against pop music and all-female bands.

Gotta run to the mailbox and see if my check from Cub's arrived!

Damned For All Time Volume III (comp CD review) (National Dust): A very diverse comp and every song is great except for a heavy metal track by Gunpro. Otherwise, many branches of the punk rock tree are well represented, from shockabilly to drunk punk to speed pop to thrash. Nervous Christians open with "Get Ahead And Go", and the singer sounds exactly like Jeff Pezzati from Naked Raygun, and that's ok with me. My other favorite tracks are from the Automatics and The Weaklings. 21 songs, and not for the weak-livered.

Dischord 1981: The Year In Seven Inches (CD review): In 1993 Dischord Records released this 48 track collection of first wave HarDCore ditties from five bands – four and a half if you consider the Teen Idles the rough draft for Minor Threat. In 1981 I was living in Maryland and attending college, and even then I was older than most of the kids in that scene. It flew under the radar even in DC. They seemed like a tight bunch well organized, and if you wanted to see the bands in person you could drive to Rockville and they’d sell you records at Yesterday & Today Records, the local musician’s workfare program.

Dischord proved that with artistic talent and a few bucks you could put out records and sell them cheaply. Y&T’s Skip Groff showed Ian Mackaye and Jeff Nelson how to do it and the fellas took it from there. Minor Threat led the way, and they were by far the tightest and most talented band of the lot. They all prayed at the alter of The Bad Brains.

I have a theory the local scene’s hardcore at the time was the Ramones played at 78 rpm, and under all the fast and furious are actual melodies. I didn’t think that at the time because it was so loud and fast I thought they’d be lucky just to make it through a song without breaking something internal. Minor Threat hit like a train the same way the Ramones did when they started. My theory doesn’t work so well with Youth Brigade and either Faith or Void (I never knew what side of their split I was listening to), who tended more toward slow metal played fast.

The Teen Idles are average. Neck Rollins fronting S.O.A. are great, sometimes steaming along like D.R.I.. Minor Threat rules. Government Issue were great early on even though the vocals suffer from sameness and also sounding like a dog barking. Youth Brigade are great even though they were heavier than I like.

Dishwasher - music to wash dishes by - volume 1 (comp7" review) (Seven-O-Two Records): This isn't just a four-song 7" with The Queers, Ten-Four, The High Fives and Scared of Chaka, it's an afternoon of reading too! Put together by Dishwasher Pete, these are four tributes to the minimum wage vocation of dish washing, the Hobo life for punks who need a job they can get easily and quit at the first sign of a tour. Dishwasher Pete puts out a zine about dishwashing, and his goal in life is to wash dishes in all fifty states. Now there's a lofty yet twisted ambition. His parents must be proud. Along with the 7" you get a great booklet filled with stories - and a cool sticker too. I haven't seen something so involved since the XTC limited edition "Making Plans For Nigel" 7". The songs are great Lookout brand power pop punk, the standout being Scared of Chaka's "Dish Militia". It hit me like an electric eel and these old legs couldn't stop dancing. Buy this and write an encouraging letter to Dishwasher Pete. He's my hero and he should be yours too.

Dropkick Murphys / Face To Face (split CD review) (Vagrant): Vagrant is a professional label, which I think is great, and both the Dropkick Murphys and Face To Face are professional bands, which impresses me only to the point of being impressed. I'm not a purist when it comes to being real, because real is often shorthand for real stupid. Bands like Face To Face and The Dropkick Murphys are falsely pushed as the real thing by trendy scenesters. It's not the end of the world, and it's probably just a generational problem on my part, but still....

Dag Nasty was the first hardcore band so slick and professional they might as well have been writing songs based on market research processed by three Cray supercomputers. I was and still am a fan of Dag Nasty, but it took me some time to realize they were the Stepford Wives of the Dischord scene. Face To Face was for me the next Dag Nasty. Once again, I fell under the spell of finely crafted, Cray processed power punk, but the truth of it came to me within days this time. Soon thereafter, the punk scene flooded itself with slick punk bands. I attribute it to supercomputers becoming smaller, faster and more affordable.

The Dropkick Murphys are as close to authentic as you can find, for a band started in Boston around 1995. They're fifteen years or so too late and a few thousand miles to the left of Belfast, but they succeed fairly well in merging traditional Irish music and culture with an American sound at home on Epitaph Records. Being from Boston helps, as opposed to Tucson.

Face To Face provide an original ("Fight Or Flight"), a cover of the Dropkick Murphy' s "Road Of The Righteous" and a cover of Stiff Little Fingers' "Wasted Life". "Fight Or Flight" is a decent rendering of the Stiff Little Fingers sound. I wonder what software they used to accomplish this. "Road Of The Righteous" is faithful to the original and besides the point really. It’s the same story with "Wasted Life", which at least serves the purpose of introducing the old band to a new generation of American kids. There's nothing to hate and a much like about Face To Face, and I'm sure they're lovely human beings who pay their taxes and don't litter, but they're just too clinical. They're more like studio musicians than a punk band.

The Dropkick Murphys provide an original ("The Dirty Glass"), a cover of Creedence Clearwater Revival's "Fortunate Son" and a cover of and old oi song by The Press called "21 Guitar Salute". "The Dirty Glass" is neat because of the bagpipes and vocal assist from former Letters To Cleo singer Kay Hanley, and "21 Guitar Salute" sends them happily into Chuck Berry territory. The Creedence cover is odd, but maybe not to you. Split EPs are an odd piece of merchandise, don't you think?

Electric Live: Jakkpot & L.E.S. Stitches (CD review) (Onefoot): I won this from the L.E.S. Stitches' label, NG, for being amongst the first 36 people to list the original members of Motley Crue. I can't say I've ever heard a Motley Crue song, and I didn't even know Pamela Anderson’s husband Tommy Lee was in the band, but thanks to the internet the answer wasn't hard to find. This is a split/live CD from two east coast bands who claim the "Punker Than You'll Ever Be Motherfugger" banner with equal spittle. The L.E.S. Stitches are a band on the rise, regurgitating the success formula of Rancid and applying it to NYC ‘70s bands The New York Dolls and The Deadboys. See them this summer on one of those outdoor mega-tours with its own skate park. Baltimore's Jakkpot have some decent releases under their belt. The problem with this CD is that the sound quality stinks, especially on the Stitches tracks, and the sets don't show the bands at their best. Electric Live should have been a cassette-only release.

Both bands are channeling the Rolling Stones through the New York Dolls. The modern update is to present it with maximum aggression. Sloppy and fast. Rude-A of Jakkpot likes to say the word "punk" between songs, always indicative of trying too hard. His stage banter is like Lou Reed. The Stitches' set is from ‘97 or ‘98 and Jakkpot was recorded in ‘98. The L.E.S. Stitches are a much better band now, and Jakkpot I'm sure plays a better set of songs than what's here. The more I think about this CD the more I wonder why it was put out in the first place.

Emo Diaries Vol. 7: Me Against The World (CD review) (Deep Elm): I think by now I've gotten the point of emo. It's creative and the production qualities are a marvel to listen to with headphones, but the preciousness changed my perception of it from refreshingly honest to cloyingly cute, and I only like cute when it applies to kids and animals. The best of the genre is Sense Field's Building -- the low point something by Joan Of Arc which made me want to mug a nerd for $10. I'm not turned off by emo lyrics since I don't care about them in the first place. Lyrics are sounds to me.

Volume 1 of this popular series came out in 1997. If this new collection is supposed to represent the cutting edge of the genre, sadly there is none. The bands tend to tread water somewhere between Jets To Brazil and Braid, mostly the former. There's nothing wrong with that, and as far as I can tell emo is here to stay. I wish crusty punk would die, but as long as there are middle class youth who pretend they're homeless and living in a post apocalyptic society, that’s not gonna happen any time soon.

I can do without the trippy, grooving qualities to the headbanger-lite theatrics of many emo bands, and the worst emo is designed to be trance-inducing progressive rock epics. The day I bang my head is the day I, oh, never mind. My favorite bands on this CD are Tabula Rasa, Halifax Code, Waterpistol and Killing Suspense. The other tracks are decent yet nothing to warrant much interest. As a once in a lifetime experience, "Animus" by One Starving Day switches from ambient new age to deathemocore. You, me and the man behind that tree are all bewildered. I once thought rap rock was the sign of the coming Apocalypse. Now I'm not so sure.

Estrus Spicey Sizzlers Sampler (comp CD review) (Estrus): Garage Rock is a description thrown at anything with a raw sound. Throughout rock history garage bands were for the most part regular bands that emulated the rockin' hits of the day in hopes of fame, fortune and chicks. Some failed because they were not very good, while others were either too fast, loud, or weird for airplay (often the band couldn't understand why their morbid fuzz-freakouts wasn't what radio wanted). The garage rock market is small yet manic. Rhino recently issued a four-CD retrospective of classic garage rock under the title Nuggets. Tiny labels constantly re-issue obscure regional garage bands for a core base of hipsters who will buy anything they can get, like jazz kooks who’d sell their souls for rare discs. Texas garage bands are considered the wildest and best. Bellingham, WA's Estrus Records is where the big modern garage bands hang their hats.

The Mono Men, The Makers, Man or Astroman?, The 1-4-5's, Satan's Pilgrims, The Volcanos, The Von Zippers and many others grace this collection. The styles vary from lounge to surf to rockabilly voodoo to psychedelia to straight ahead rocking punk. It took me a few listens but I'm really into this now. There's much depth and underplayed intensity to be found on these recordings. The best part is that this comp is just a few bucks ($1 more at Tower), so you have no excuse to pass this by. You might just expand your musical vocabulary beyond what your friend Stinky says is effin’ cool. Doh!

Everything Is Beautiful (comp CD review) (Geffen): Free I tells ya, this was free! An alternative comp - the possibilities for hating this are endless. Alternative is as sincere as Joe Isuzu. It's the trendiest bandwagon jumping you can buy without a prescription. Not all alternative sucks, but a lot of it has a shelf life of bread. It's about pushing new product. Don't get too attached to a band because an even more market-tested one is coming up next. As I listen to each of these eighteen groups I'll comment and award 1 to 5 stars (*), 1 for total crap and 5 for being not bad but still not anything I'd ever recommend to a gathering of skins:

Remy Zero - decent fuzz pop (****), Girls Against Boys - white folks shouldn't try to be funky, and they should never ever scratch (*), Rob Zombie - Techno is disco for pissed off bi-curious white guys (*), Pitchshifter - almost like Trenchmouth but too hard and trendy (**), Home Grown - Good ol' love song power pop with slightly off-key choruses I find endearing (*****), Eels - fey and silly at the same time (**), The Crystal Method - music to twirl to while sucking a Binky and wearing a Garfield backpack (**), DJ Spooky - I hate crap, I mean rap, but this was pretty good not too funky at all (***), Propellerheads - lounge funk with sampling (*), Cowboy Junkies - 3% country, 0% junkie, 97% well recorded rock atmospherics (*****), Rufus Wainwright - Beatle-esque (**), Embrace - non-twirly rock you can twirl to if drugs are mixed correctly. Tries too hard to be an anthem (**), Hayden - Psychedelic guitar that's the picture in the dictionary under "generic" (**), The Bomboras - fun surf like the Barracudas. Go Cat Go! (***** and highly recommended), The Ghastly Ones - Spaghetti Western surf guitar instrumental that kicks tushy (*****), Robbie Fulks - oddball voice over nicely played country pop (****), Flat Duo Jets - Every Las Vegas lounge cliché meet in a bar (**), Phantom Planet - Let's just say they play the flute in this one. Another Beatle ass kiss (**)

The Excursion Compilation (comp CD review) (Excursion): I keep up with what I can but there are many bands and record labels I've never heard of. I look at zines these days and I don’t know any bands. I'm not going to drop hundreds of dollars on 7"s and CDs from unknown bands, so the occasional compilation is a good thing. Thankfully this one was $3 and change. Sixteen songs from fourteen bands on the Excursion label out of Seattle, WA, a city forever associated with grunge the way DC is with straight edge. The first eight songs by Red Rocket, State Route 522, Hutch, Serpico, Ten-O-Seven and Brand New Unit all have a heavy Jawbreaker + light All influence, and if you weren't paying attention you’d think they were all by the same eclectic band. I liked these songs a lot. Song nine and up stay firmly in the rock punk bang your head camp. Any song you can bang your head to is actually a heavy metal song. There's even a grind-core song by Botch. Grind-core is the weirdest thing ever. The singing is always the same "Blah Blah Blue Blah Blow!" (or something) in this comically deep monster movie voice. I don't get it. A good comp, but like most of them, I'll tape a few songs off this and, even though I won't trade it in, it will never see the light of day again.

Fat Wreck Chords Presents Survival Of The Fattest Vol. Two (comp LP review) (Fat Wreck Chords): From what little I know about Fat bands I assumed they all either sound like NOFX or Bad Religion. I saw a Fat Wreck Chords "on tour" concert a few years back and wasn't impressedl. Too many mosh parts and Bad Religion clones. This LP was $5, so why not give it a chance? I like a number of the songs but I'm not that much into the Fat genre. The production values are top notch, and the bands sure know how to play. It’s the stink of teenage skate punk I can't relate to. I also don't look good in a backwards baseball cap and baggy shorts. A drummer must have mixed all the songs because they stand out as the lead instrument. The bands I liked were Diesel Boy, Good Riddance, Bracket, and especially Tilt. On "Libel" the female lead singer sounds a lot like Debbie Harry of Blondie.. What a great voice. No snide pissy grrrl screaming - she can really belt it out. When she sings "follow me all the way home" you know she could sing on Broadway and bring down the house.

Feer Of Smell (comp LP review) (Vermiform): This a re-issue of a record from 1992, and it's one of those collections intended to warp the mind by presenting a clinically cruel world filled with sociopaths programmed by Society to torture and antagonize without any remorse. You get a lot of the same sentiment in industrial/techno, but since most of that is disco for pissed off bi-curious white guys it's easy to blow it off as another excuse to shake your groove tushie. The sixteen tracks on this comp runs the gamut of grindcore, jazz damage, sound-collage, straight ahead punk and prank phone calls ("Is there a Dick in the house?). I liked some and hated others (I despise the cowardice of prank phone calls), but comps like this are made to present a unified perspective of callousness and alienation under the guise of Art. The comedy on this record is presented as insincere irony, so spare me that argument.

Is the world really nothing more than hatred, demented pathologies and calculated cruelty? It's there for sure, more than polite society admits to, but that's not all there is. The worst of human behavior is not any more real than people being nice to each other. That argument assumes we should embrace cruelty, hate, destruction and self-destruction because that's either what's actually normal or we are doomed, doomed, doomed anyway, so why not jump headfirst into the tree shredder. That's either nihilistic, which is mindless, or a cheap way to draw attention to yourself. There's nothing more pretentious than turning suffering into art, as if art justifies suffering. If your life sucks and there's no way out, kill yourself. What can I tell you. Life sucks, that's true, just don't expect me to be impressed because you figured it out on your own.

Here's the roll call on Feer Of Smell: Eric Wood, The Nation of Ulysses, Tit Wrench, Rorschach, Man Is The Bastard, Sugarshock, Rich Oliver, Heroin, Native Nod, Infest, 1.6 band, A. Woodrow, Merel, Moss Icon, Sam & Joe, and Hell No.

Forward Til Death - Lookout! Records Sampler Compilation (comp CD review) (Lookout!): Some people hate Lookout because they made barrels of cash from Green Day. Nothing pisses off kids who don't work for a living more than the success of others. If you don't like the bands on Lookout because they're not punk enough, all I can tell you is you shouldn't care if the label exists or not. The narrow definition of punk you live by today is based on bulls—t. Five years ago you were probably listening to whatever was on the radio and asking mommy if you can eat dinner at Timmy's. You may look punk but it's a costume.

Every year Lookout puts out an affordable comp of released and unreleased songs from the last year's catalog. While still the best consistent source for power pop punk bands like The Mr. T. Experience and The Groovie Ghoulies, they've also signed a healthy roster of garage pop bands like The Smugglers and the Donnas – the latter good for three songs. There are always a number of keepers on a Lookout comp,  the rest mostly enjoyable too.

Standout tracks: Citizen Fish sounding like Madness on "Habit", Pansy Division's use of blaring horns on "Bad Boyfriend", Mr. T's Buddy Holly inspired "King Dork" and Servotron's "I Sing The Body Cybernetic", which makes me think of Spizz Energy. 23 songs for about five bucks. No reason and no excuse not to buy this. Tell me why Lookout isn't punk and I'll smile at your cute outfit and baaaaad attitude.

Gabba Gabba Hey - A Tribute To The Ramones (comp CD review) (Triple X): The big fear about tribute albums is "will these bands turn classics into crap?" It's sweet when you're holding a loving tribute to a band you love, made by other bands who love them too. You kind of feel vindicated, because here's proof many others were influenced by them too. But what if the cover bands suck to begin with? What if they interpret songs incorrectly? What if they miss the point of the band and are just on the tribute to gain exposure? Oh, whoa was me…

The TXC tribute stunk because the bands were mostly wimpy alternative nobodies who made every XTC tune sound like pap. The Ramones were a punk band partly influenced by the Bay City Rollers. There's an aesthetic purity on the Ramones' first four albums that's hard to explain and reproduce. It may look simple, but it's very difficult to recreate the magic of  these records.

This 1991 collection is well stocked with bands like The Creamers, White Flag, Bad Religion, Groovie Ghoulies, D.I., Flesheaters, Flower Leperds, Bulimia Banquet, and Mojo Nixon. Mojo's Rockabilly take on "Rockaway Beach" is the best song. Mojo is cooler than most people think. Pigmy Love Circus turns "Beat On The Brat" into a slow metal headbanger. Which I hate. Not that I know too much about L7, but they make "Suzy Is A Headbanger" sound like every other L7 song I've heard. In general, this is a good comp but I would only recommend it to serious Ramones fans. Do you think there's someone out there who only knows the Ramones through a tribute compilation? That’s too wrong to be possible.

Garage Punk Unknowns - Part I, Mid-Sixties America's Teen Garage Rock Action Blast! 1965-1967 (comp CD review) (Crypt): I realize some of you don't know the difference between garage punk, your elbow and a toaster pastry. Garage Punk is a genre mostly associated with collector geeks sporting Beatles hairstyles and flared jeans - the guys at record shows who smell like old newspapers. Rodney Bingenheimer is garage rock's poster child. In the great debate of where punk began, garage bands of the ‘60s score highly with many if not most music aficionados. The 70’s punk forefathers drew much of their inspiration from the DIY garage bands found on the old Nuggets comp (recently re-released in a boxed set by Rhino).

There's a small yet rabid collector's market for the old, obscure (the more obscure the better) garage bands that inhabited the nooks and crannys of America's disconnected music market of the ‘50s and ‘60s. Back then, for the majority of bands with no chance for national fame, be it for lack of talent or good representation, the country was divided into small and large markets. Rarely did the hits of one small city make it to other small cities outside of day-trip range. Collections like Garage Punk Unknowns provide glimpses into what everyone was missing. This CD is very enjoyable. I hear you can find collections that stink like crazy.

What is a garage band? It has a number of meanings and uses. It's a generic term for any band that's not famous, never will be famous, or are famous for how well they fit the garage band image. The mental picture is a bunch of tone-deaf teens in dad's garage spending hours trying to play like The Rolling Stones. Garage is sometimes seen as the practice or minor league stage of a band's development. A band without talent will be derided as a garage band not worthy of leaving the garage. A talented band who play rough and ragged will be labeled garage. Billy Childish puts out excellent records that emulate the exact sound of ‘60s garage bands. For what garage bands may lack in talent they often make up for in sincerity, determination and gung-ho weirdness. The best garage bands are the ones who suck but don’t realize they suck.

A misconception about early garage is that bands weren't looking to be popular. Hell, punk's DIY, anti-corporate stance didn't come about till the ‘80s, when punk spread to the suburbs where mom and dad supplied most punk's room and board. Garage bands emulated The Rolling Stones, The Beatles, The Byrds, Paul Revere And The Raiders, The Kinks - really any band with a "The" in their name. Some Nuggets"bands were good enough for the radio while most others were too intentionally or unintentionally hard, extreme or weird. Garage Punk Unknowns Part 1 is two and a half sides of the seven record Garage Punk Unknown series, presenting 31 tracks of "pre-psych, pre-prog, Stones-influenced garage". The quality of the tracks are excellent and it's easy to daydream they should have been national hits in their time. Poor distribution and media coverage dictated otherwise, and that's the pleasure of comps like this. If I owned a record store I'd put this on all the time, knowing customers would think I'm some kind of frigging genius for even knowing it existed.

74 minutes of non-stop cool, and not one clunker in the lot. Here's some band names: Teddy Boys, Kempy & The Guardians, Danny & The Other Guys, Motor City Bonnevilles, King-Beez, Avengers, Bobby Roberts and the Raveons.

Go Kart Vs. the Corporate Giant (comp CD review) (Go Kart): 28 songs (9 unreleased till now) from 21 bands out of NY's Go Kart Records. Go Kart is a small group of music lovers who put out all kinds of punk releases, for a nice change little of what you'd consider straight edge, power pop or hard rock punk. The bands share a sense of humor and a love of rocking punk. The spectrum is covered from the lounge stylings of Black Velvet Flag to The Meatmen (if you require an introduction to the Mighty Tesco Vee, you're so new school you need baggy pants just to hide your diaper!). Other bands of note are the Lunachicks, The Voluptuous Horror of Karen Black, Weston, Trick Babys, The Wives and Buttsteak. Thankfully none of them come off as bratty kids. Really worth it for good music that won't preach at you or demand you to bang your head. Go-kart might be the most underrated label around. Check this out.

Goin' After Pussy: Tidbits and Teasers (comp CD review) (Junk): No, there isn't a band called Goin' After Pussy; this is the long awaited $4.95 sampler from Long Beach's Junk Records, the label by and for degenerates. Lou is the brains, Katon is the personality and Nancy is the evil troll in the warehouse that makes it all possible. These bands live to drink and love every fast & loud band to ever crawl out of the sewers of NY's Bowery. I'm talking about the Heartbreakers, the Dolls, the Dead Boys....

And this isn’t a collection of b-sides either. You could call this a greatest hits from Junk, whose roster includes Electric Frankenstein, The Humpers, Manic Hispanic, The Dragons, The Weaklings, Zeke, Boris The Sprinkler, Dimestore The Haloes, The New Wave Hookers, Jakkpot, The Lowdowns, The Stallions, The River City Rapists, The Dips--ts, The Candy Snatchers, The Slobs, The Bulemics and the Onyas.

This isn't your little brother's punk rock. This is what turns sober men into alcoholics and women from good homes into whores. In addition to the music you hear messages from Katon's answering machine. He's more a concept than a person. If you've ever been loudly insulted at a party in Long Beach for no reason, it was probably Katon. The losers at Junk Records are the nicest people you'll ever meet, but they honestly don't give two fuggs about you. Nice! Take your hand off your pee-pee and buy this now.

Heide Sez - Lookout Records Comp. (comp CD review) (1996): 26 songs from the Lookout Records class of 1996. Top songs too, with no fillers. Lookout specializes in power pop punk and I couldn't be happier. Bands you wouldn't expect are here too - Fifteen, Citizen Fish, Avail and Couch Of Eureka add variety to the standard Ramones-tinged pop. What more can I say about a comp with The Crumbs, The Queers, The Groovie Ghoulies, The Mr. T. Experience, Sweet Baby and Cub? Go out an get this! Nuh-ooooow!!

Hellcat Records Presents... Give 'Em The Boot (Comp CD review) (Hellcat/Epitaph): So, anyways, Tim Armstrong was in a band called Operation Ivy. Maybe you've heard of them. Some kids consider them old school, which makes me Fred Flintstone playing "rock" records by having a phonograph bird put his beak down between the grooves. Operation Ivy revitalized ska by combining it with hardcore energy. After Op Ivy broke up Tim formed Rancid, who put out some product until Tim's body was possessed by the soul of Joe Strummer, formerly of The Clash (and still breathing at the time). ...And Out Come The Wolves was the best Clash album the Clash never recorded. Tim has his own record label, Hellcat, and a mission similar to and updated from Strummer's - get out the positive messages of traditional ‘60s Jamaican ska, late ‘70s 2-Tone ska bands and the ’79- early ‘80s second generation punk & oi often incorrectly referred to as '77.

This is a twenty band/twenty song sampler. Like it says on the website: "..very finest ska and '77 style punk.. the true embodiment of the 'Hellcat Sound'.. and serves as a roadmap to the label's musical direction." Manufacturing and distribution is supplied by Epitaph, the bastard child of Bad Religion.

Who's here?" Rancid, of course, with "The Brothels”, good enough to have been on their last CD. The first Rancid releases were a shade of blah, but recently they've hit a groove and can crank out hits at will. One of the best oi bands of all time is on this too, the Business, lending oi cred like few others can. The lettering and boot photo that adorn the CD are pure oi, but the label itself is based more on ska and rocksteady. The Dropkick Murphy's, U.S. Bombs, and the Swingin' Utters provide the '77, but most of the selections veer closer to The Skatalites than the Specials. Union 13 does a cool version of Rancid's "Roots Radicals", which calls back to the comp. title, Give 'Em The Boot. The big theme is "Roots" - what Tim sees as the roots. Maybe Tim's out to explore the roots of The Clash. It's worth noting '77 punk politics were heavily influenced by Jamaican ska and reaggae. This retails for $4.99.

Hell Comes To Your House! Vol. 1 - (comp CD review) (Bemisbrain/Time Bomb): One of the best early hardcore punk comps has been re-released by Time Bomb Recordings. Other great hardcore comps from the early ‘80s are American Youth Report, Flex Your Head, Let Them Eat Jellybeans, Rodney On The ROQ and This Is Boston Not L.A. According to an e-mail I received from Time Bomb my original LP is worth a lot of money, so I guess I should stop using it as big coaster for pitchers of cheap beer.

The look of the original album is early punk goth, with photos of kids dressed like extras from the Living Dead movies. Most of the bands on side two went on to be full-blown goth bands, which strikes me as standard Los Angeles glam mixed with a self-obsessed campiness taken too seriously. The Misfits may have set the horror movie fashion tone, but they, at least in the beginning, played great hardcore four-chord guitar fuzz. Side one is pure punk, featuring both famous bands like Social Distortion and Red Cross, plus some local Long Beach talent that while great didn't stick around too long.

The bands on this comp are: 45 Grave, Christian Death, 100 Flowers, Rhino 39, Super Heroines, Social Distortion, Legal Weapon, Red Cross/Modern Warfare, Secret Hate and The Conservatives. Social D to be top-40 punk stars while the slender brothers MCDonald steered Red Kross into more garage-psychedelic waters. Black lipstick addicts can find old goth punk on those cheap multi-set CD comps at the mall. If you like Secret Hate and The Conservatives, look for the old Mystic Records comps under the names We Got Power.

Not a bad piece of nostalgia here. Time Bomb should have done more than just reprint the original cover art and liner notes, since this is a classic. I think Vol. II of Hell Comes To Your House contained country-punk bands. Now THAT I'd like to hear again (but only once).

Honest Don's Welcome Wagon (Comp CD review) (Honest Don's): $5 at a Chixdiggit/Groovie Ghoulies/Muffs show. A relatively new label out of San Francisco (actually a division of Fat) with big names on the roster, for me the tops being The Riverdales, Teen Idols, Chixdiggit and MDC (!?). Dave from MDC is also in The Submissives, doing "Sissy Made For You" and doing it well. Also on this comp are Diesel Boy, The Other, Dance Hall Crashers, Limp, Mad Caddies, J Church, and Me First an The Gimme Gimmes. Honest Don has a great mix going - bopping ska, Epitaph/Fat Wreck Chords/Green Day commercial punk, and the Ramones-tribute by Ben Weasel's Riverdales. "Cafes and Bombs" by The Other sounds like that Green Day hit that starts off slow and works into their usual hyper-power pop, except here they play cock-rock lite guitar riffs instead of going for the throat. Me First and The Gimme Gimmes do a nice job with Elton John's "Rocket Man", smartly keeping the melody while beating the hell out of the drums in that punky rhythm I find so quaint. All in all a great comp.

Honest Don's Greatest S--ts (comp CD review) (Honest Don's): The second affordable comp from this offshoot of Fat Wreck Chords. My funny bone tells me they control My Records too, but I could be wrong. If Honest Don's is supposed to be a label for bands with a slightly older demographic they've done a pretty good job so far. They have Chixdiggit, The Riverdales and the Teen Idols, so what else do you want? A nice collection of fourteen songs with the stupidest title and cover art. If they're trying to appeal to an older crowd why have a cheap cartoon of a clown taking a large dump in a huge bowl of cereal. Is that supposed to be funny? Great title too – if you’re fourteen maybe. I keep forgetting punk is for and by idiots.

Hope For Us (comp 7") (Discontent): I see four bands with singers that sing, scream and talk; four drummers who beat the hell out of their kits but with no rhyme or reason; four guitarists with long hair who never look up and resent they’re not touring with Sabbath, and four bass players wondering if their instruments are plugged in.

The 4 bands are from Wisconsin and their names are Damitol, Animal Farm, One Day Away and Buried. It must be something in the cheese.

Hopelessly Devoted To You Too (Comp CD review) (Hopeless): It says right on the package, "Maximum Price $3.98 - please!" Tower sells this for $4.99, those corporate bastards! Sure, it's the only place f self-mutilated freaks can get a minimum wage job, but they're The Man, man! Corporate Big Brother! Hopeless Records is a California label less known than Fat Wreck Chords but just as deep in its catalog. They've released Schlong's Punk Side Story, 88 Fingers Louie and the latest Queers 7". The bands on this comp run in the familiar ska & punk genres, but they generally play harder and the subject matter a bit more mature than the competition. 11 of the 21 tracks are exclusive to this CD. The Queers cover Screeching Weasel's "Like A Parasite" and the "Bonus Track" is a mystery version of "Walk Like An Egyptian". Other bands are Against All Authority, Dillinger Four, Falling Sickness, Mustard Plug, Nobodys, Heckle, Funeral Oration and Digger. This comp is definitely growing on me, and if you're a ska/punk/street/skate dude or dudette this is a cheap introduction to a well run label.

Hot Curly Weenie Vol. 2 (comp CD review) (Recess): There's a metric ton of snotty ferocity on this comp that makes it ten times better than your average SoCal label comp, which aims no higher than pimply high school rejects. The freaking Dwarves are now on Recess, and their nihilism runs through most of these 31 tracks from 17 bands. 12 are previously unreleased. The female-fronted bands go out of their way to be as unladylike as possible. Also endless sloppy punk and non-metal thrash that runs ahead of itself with an urgency that threatens to tear everything apart. A great collection and it's less than three bucks. Give a copy to your little brother who thinks Propaghandi is radical

Here's the bands (quite a diversity and some big names too): Quincy Punx, Furious George, F.Y.P., Grumpies, Sex Offenders, Dwarves, Jag Offs, Berzerk (not the Baltimore band), Pud, Hidden Resentments, Stun Guns, Kankersores, J.C.C.C., Criminals, Crumbs, Four Letter Words and Les Turds.

I Can't Believe It's Not Water (Comp CD review) (Just Add Water) Compilations are more like catalogs than records. As you approach each track, you don’t know if you'll love, hate, or be totally indifferent to what you hear. Comps are good for making tapes, and they're better than throwing $12 at groups you know nothing about, but they're more advertising than works of art. A crappy song here and there and chances are the comp will never see the light of day again. This CD is great and the nice folks at Just Add Water are smart too. They picked a genre (in this case power pop punk), represented all the sub-genres within that genre and made sure each track was of a consistent quality. It also helps to have access to great songs by great bands. 26 bands/26 songs, each a keeper. If you don't like power pop punk you'll think every song is the same, but if you do this is the best collection you'll find, with not a weak song in the lot. The best tracks are by The Lillingtons (X-cellent), The Crumbs (imitating The Clash) and The Parasites doing a cover of Sweet Baby's "She's From Salinas". This CD is going to bankrupt me. Now I have to buy everything these groups have ever recorded. Wah!!!!!

In Flight Program - Revelation Records Collection 97 (comp CD review): I've always believed Revelation Records to be a two-dimensional record label for Krishna's and neck-vain-bulging-screaming-hard-stance-straight-edge-middle-class-suburban-white-guys in $50-hooded-sweatshirts. Either way a little too much self-awareness for an old fart like me. This comp cost (pay no more than) $4.99, so what a great opportunity to either be right or wrong. After these 26 songs/bands, I'd say I was only half right. Sure, there's the unfiltered second generation SXE preachiness of Chain of Strength, Ignite, Youth of Today, Gorilla Biscuits, Judge, Shelter, Underdog, Inside Out and Bold, but I was pleasantly surprised with Sense Field, Texas Is The Reason, Farside, Shades Apart, Bodyjar and No Fun At All. Texas Is The Reason and Farside reminded me of early Lemonheads, when Ben Deily was still in the band. Whirlpool, Chinchilla, and beta minus mechanic all feature female singers with strong voices (hey, who let chicks into the emo-pit!?). Some of these bands are fun enough to be on Fat Wreck Chords. Still too much crunchy metal/rap posturing to make me change my mind about Rev Records, but I'm glad they give other bands a chance.

It's All About The Punk, Baby: TheOrangeSpot.com Sessions; Vol 4 (comp CD review) (Orange Peal): There are a number of professional sites associated with this label, but it's all a bit vague. It looks to be backed by money, and they handle recordings, shows and promotions. Is this a corporate venture pretending to be an indie? Hhhhmmm....

There's variation yet also consistency with seventeen of the eighteen bands on the comp. The Lab Rats, who should be on Recess Records since they sound like The Dwarves meet The Exploited, are thrown in at the end in the pop-punk tradition of signing off with noise and distortion. Most punks are kids, and their tastes run toward MXPX, NOFX, Rancid, 25th wave ska, emo, The Dropkick Murphys, and yes, Blink 182 and Green Day. Kiddie Punk, being a genre of sub-genres, manages to offer divergent styles with wide appeal to the entire demographic. In other words, if you like any one band or style there's no reason not to like its cousins. I hear a common slappy drum style, a similar need to dip into the chugga chugga guitar toilet, snotty singing sung through the nose and a wall of guitar fuzz I find to be the only redeeming quality to the whole endeavor. I'm a huge fan of Bob Mould's guitar work - the masterful way he alternated between guitar leads and walls of distortion. To the last, the bands on It's All About The Punk, Baby handle their guitars in a pop-punk homage to Mould and the results are surprisingly mature. This stands in opposition to everything going on around it, and I wished I could listen to the guitars in isolation.

There's some punk, emo-pop, ska, and what have you. The general emphasis is pop-punk with aggressive guitars. If I were twenty years younger I would consider this brilliant. As it is, the music wasn't written for anyone over eighteen, and when I was eighteen, comic books were 25 cents, the sun always shined brightly and women were not allowed to work outside the home. The Taliban in NY ran a pretty tight ship,  I'll tell you that much.

It's The Cheap DAMAGED GOODS Sampler CD (review) (Damaged Goods): Easily the best comp I've purchased in a while, from the UK label you should get to know better. London's Damaged Goods is like the old Stiff label - scrappy and eclectic out the wazoo. Their catalog includes, among many others, The Dils, Snap Her, Spizz Energy, Hopper, Thee Headcoates, The Revillos, Slaughter and the Dogs, Pansy Division and the Sniveling S--ts. The thirty songs on this very affordable collection stay well within the confines of lo-fi, garage and tough-edged retro-pop. Each song is a keeper and serves as a nice introduction to areas of punk not often traveled by the spikey haired proletariat. Once you get the cookie-cutter angst and anger out of your system, these tunes will fill the void with wit, hooks, power and enough cool for fifty beatniks.

Before I list some band names, I must say I can't stop listening to Helen Love's "We Love You", a casio-driven pop gem that makes me long for the days of pogo and kooky thrift store fashion -- Helen Golightly, Cuckooland, Dustball, Period Pains, Sexton Ming, Television Personalities, Manic Street Preachers, Twister, J Church, Budget Girls, Anorak Girl and Phantom Pregnancies. I'm sure none of these bands print patches for your mom to sew onto your designer punk jackets. Sorry, crustie the punk clown, this is punk without the political posing and style fascism.

Dave Parasite Presents... Japan Punk Kills You (comp CD review) (American Pop Project): If imitation is the sincerest form of flattery, Japan would be on it's knees giving lip service to the United States for every musical style it ever produced. These people go nuts for American music. Dave Parasite is the brains behind The Parasites, America's most underrated pop punk band. In line with such things, the comp put out by Ben Weasel is filled with bands that sound like Screeching Weasel. Joe Queer's comp is more eclectic but still leans heavily towards The Queers. Dave's comp is filled with bands that love The Parasites, with some retro power pop tossed in. Twenty songs from twenty bands who come off sounding more American than we do (during WWII it was said you could find the German spy because he spoke English better than Americans). Fans of power pop punk should love this, while rusty punks will puke upon contact.

From Dave Parasite's liner notes: "Japan is a country of opposites. It combines ancient traditions and ultra modern industry. It has colorful, bustling cities and small villages which seem unaffected by the passage of time. In the cities, you can find crowded alleyways, filled with merchants and customers bargaining under colorful canopies, within sight of major thoroughfares pulsing with traffic and huge, mesmerizing luminescent billboards that light up the streets all night. If you're lucky enough to go there, you will find a scene where everyone is accepted; where the word "jaded" doesn't exist. No one is concerned with who's more punk than who, they simply love the music. You'll find an audience that is boiling over with infectious enthusiasm that is impossible to resist. Kids at the shows are so polite that they ask you in advance if they can stagedive during your set, and if that's not cool, I don't know what is... If I suddenly disappear one day, you'll know where to find me."

Junk Punk - a punkrock compilation (CD review) (Awesome Dawson Records): 34 songs from 21 Northeast bands on this $5 comp. funded and distributed by the bands themselves. Sound quality varies but there's lots of good punk rock going on, mostly in the cheap-guitar-four-chord-short-loud-fast-rules variety. No metal, no obligatory mosh parts, and no musical talent to get in the way - just the way I like it!! Not a bad song in the bunch. Heeeere's some band names: The Piss Shivers, The Skabs, Joey Asthma, Aisle 9, Unemployed, The Martians, Bucket Of Monkey, Buglite and Headboard. Bye now!

Knock Out In The third Round - (Comp CD review) (Knock-Out): A really swah-eet comp from a German label that only set me back five clams. The bands are retro- Euro- ‘79 but with enough variety and cleverness to keep it consistently interesting. The opening track by P Paul Fenech is a swing/jazz/rockabilly ditty with a singer who sounds like John Otway. Track 2 from The Butlers captures the live sound of early Specials. Track 3 is typicalyl great Italian street punk by Klasse Kriminale. This goes on for 25 tracks and should appeal to every punk over his or her snotty youth stage. Very little oi and a lot of good old style street punk for both punks and skins to stomp their boots in unity. Also a few reminders oi sprang from mod, that came from American and Jamaican black music. An exceedingly strong CD more than highly recommended. I'll be working out to this one fer shure.

Some other bands on here are the Anti-Nowhere League, Oxymoron, Blaggers, Glory Stompers, Spicky Joys, Son of Bronto, Youth Anthem, the Oppressed and the Wernt.

Live From The Masque - 3 volume compilation (CD review) (Year One): I hope Year One went into this expecting to lose money, because while they're performing an archival function by releasing rare live material by mostly obscure California punk bands, I doubt a paying audience is out there. Early punk is for the most part a great unknown infamous by reputation only. It's one thing to buy the Germs album, but drop $13 to get six Germs songs on a live comp? I doubt it. I bought these used only because it's my job.

The Masque was a legendary dive in Los Angeles, "a dark subterranean basement off Hollywood Blvd. The ceilings were very low and exposed pipes hung everywhere close to your head. They filmed porno movies there." Baltimore had a place like once. The Masque was closed by the police and Fire Marshall as a threat to the neighborhood. Drunk punks trashing everything in sight tends to bring that response by the authorities. Also a rehearsal space, crash pad and punk community center, the Masque was home to the early L.A. scene. The liner notes claim people were more open minded in dress and behavior, and you were accepted as long as you weren't a total poseur. I bet this last part wasn't the case, but hey.

The bands on these three CD's are The Weirdos, The Bags, The Germs, The Skulls, F-Word, The Alleycats, X, The Zeros, The Eyes, The Dickies, The Randoms and Black Randy & The Metro Squad. Recorded on a four-track on Feb. 24 & 25, 1978, these tapes were from a benefit to help pay legal fees arising from the club’s closing. The tapes were left to rot in a cardboard box for seventeen years. The quality isn't "off the board" but it’s also not that bad. Most of the bands were one or no hit wonders, blending the Stooges and The NY Dolls with Hollywood's indigenous glam rock. Besides the chance to hear early X and Dickies I can't find a reason to buy this. This should have not been released on three CDs. One packed CD would have sold more and done more to enhance the image of late ‘70s American punk.

The Loiterers/Endangered Feces (split EP review) (handi-cock): This eight-song 7" was sent to me from Merrick, Lawn Guyland (NY), a few towns away from where I grew up in Oceanside. The kids there may be poor but their parents do ok, ya know what I'm saying? The Loiterers are from Valley Stream, another few towns away and a suburb of Brooklyn made famous in Steve Buscemi's film tribute to regional loserism titled Tree's Lounge. Endangered Feces, besides having the most childish band name of the year, might be from either Brooklyn or Queens.

I assume The Loiterers are the main band on the split because their side of the low-toner Xerox cover is where you'll find the quaintly nostalgic punky price tag disclaimer "Pay no more then 3 bucks". "Then" should be "than", but than again watt doo I no? I like these goofs well though and appreciate their snotty humor. The lyrics sheet says of the band, "The Loiterers were Ian, Jen, Al, Duncan. The Loiterers are Ian, Dirt, Jay, Duncan. The Loiterers R.I.P., Viva The Loiterers. For booking, call 516-339-PUNK." The music is a copy of what the Queers did in their earliest days when Pappy stumbled in to belt out a few tunes and throw down (and up) some beers. It's hard to make out the words since they're more regurgitated than sung. Mostly it comes out as chunks of "Blah blah blur blah blay." It’s four chord guitar fuzz and four dollar drum set backbeats. I'm a big fan of this kind of pure American hardcore, and The Loiterers get points from me for playing an old style of musical sarcasm to a decidedly all-ages crowd. Mature immaturity at its best.

Endangered Feces hump a few different genres, from harmonious power punk to Bad Religion to early Lookout to "Don't Drink The Milk", a rip-off of Lawnmower Deth. Not bad but very noncommittal. Not bad but nothing special. Eclectic is good but only to a point.

Available through: Riotous Assembly, PO Box 16396, Portland, OR 97292

Los Punkeros - Raza Punk Y Hardcore (Comp CD review) (Aztlan): Fourteen hardcore songs sung in Espanol by Lodo Y Asfalto, Los Hijos De and my local favorite, Manic Hispanic, who cover "God Save The Queen" with their usual mix of humor and perfect musicianship. Most of these songs were recorded in the United States so maybe they recorded these songs in Spanish just for this comp. The label, out of San Francisco, exists to promote music by Spanish speaking bands of all types. This CD isn't even listed on their web site.

The songs are decent and in the hard hitting style of non-metal speed punk. The lyrics are in a foreign language so I know they're talking about me. I just know it. Why? Why not?

Not knowing what the words mean takes away from the experience but I like screaming along to words that sound funny (because it's not English, you know?) Seriously, it's like those great MRR comps from the ‘80s where punks in Italy scream and it sounds like cats fighting in an alley. OK, enough racism for one night. One song is in English and another may be too but in typical hardcore fashion it's hard to tell.

Mailorder Is Fun (comp CD review) (Asian Man): Hey there. Run a record label? Then put on your pants (It's a little known fact that 80% of guys surf the internet with their pants off) and pay attention. This is what you must do if you want your label to get noticed. A low-price compilation is very important. This packed Asian Man Records comp is suggested retail $3.99. I don't care how many ads you put into zines: unless you just read about the band or heard them at a friend's house, very few kids are going to drop their minimum wage income on recordings from unknown quantities. Don't do a comp for profit - that will hopefully come later. This is pure advertising. I'll buy just about any comp for $3.99. I've seen the Asian Man ads a zillion times but now that I've heard the comp I at least know what they sound like and the relative strength of their roster. I'd also suggest loading the CD cover with banners like "Punk/Ska/Emo Compilation", "29 songs, 29 bands", and biggest of all, "$3.99!!!!". Don't make a comp that doesn't look like a comp, and don't squeeze "Suggested Retail Price $3.99" in a space only 1/4" high like they did here. This is commerce first, art second. Also label the bands by style in the liner notes like these guys do. To say it's all just music promotes ignorance as laid-back acceptance. I want to know if a band sounds like another band I already know. That's useful information. I'm not going to discover I actually like crap because you didn't tell me a band sounds like Pearl Jam. Know who doesn't like to label bands? Hippies, because they're high on pot and acid and don't know what day it is.

Now that the Nyquil has kicked in I can discuss the CD itself. A surprisingly competent collection of songs of the ska, power pop, and emo genres. In this era of ska overload and backlash it's nice to hear bands with more lyrical maturity than what's been recently coded onto little silver frisbees. I love ska for about twelve minutes at a time. Link 80 does one of the better Operation Ivy imitations around. Korea Girl is listed as a cross between Seam, Pavement and Velocity Girl. All I know is that I like them very much. I haven't heard a guitar like that since Robert Fripp recorded with The Roches. Tuesday and Alakline Trio offer fine slices of emo. The Blue Meanies cover The Vindictive's "Dummy Room", done beautifully here but the original has been known to make strangers shove pencils in my mouth as I flail helplessly on the ground. When the frick is someone going to put together a Vindictives tribute box-set collection? The nine bonus tracks from Fueled By Ramen Records are mostly poppy punk. The rest is ska in all 47 varieties from bands like The Chinkees, Less Than Jake, Monkey, Pushover, The Bruce Lee Band, Johnny Socko, Unsteady, Slapstick, MU330 and Let's Go Bowling.

A very good deal for $3.99 from a record label with a strong roster of bands.

Mandingo/Zoinks! (split 7" review) (Dr. Strange): A 49 cent closeout at Lou's in Encinitis. Score!!!!! Zoinks! is from boot-e-ful Reno (slogan:"Nevada's Other City") whilst Mandingo lives someplace else. This four song split was released to commemorate their summer ‘95 tour. Zoinks! is pop in the vein of Dinosaur Jr. and Jawbreaker - before those bands took a dive. Mandingo pull from the same two bands but are a bit harder and sloppier. "Muleheaded" is a real keeper, reminding me of Husker Du's "In A Free Land" with more melody. Worth $3? Maybe not, but for four bits I'm taking the whole family to dinner on the savings. This gets better every time I listen to it. Mandingo is the devil. I know because my turntable sped up to 100 rpms for no reason.

MOC Records sampler (comp 7" review) (Debris): One point off for not having a picture sleeve. What's the excuse? None. Five points added for putting a song by M.O.T.O. on this. Oval-Teen and Bunnygrunt contribute one song each of great folk-rocking lo-fi, and Ken Stringfellow throws up a short wall of guitar fuzz that pays equal homage to John-Paul Sartre and the Velvet Underground. Pretentious only if the band is, I guess. Playing 7"s are a lot of work, by the way.

The Money Shot (Comp review) (Chunklet): This comp, from issue #12 of the fanzine Chunklet, came in a thin cardboard sleeve and had a cute cartoon on the front of a little boy shooting water from a school water fountain into a little girl's face. On the back you see the water fountain and the bottom half of the little boy layed out on his back with only one shoe on, the implication being she hit him so hard the other shoe flew off. If you don't know what this all means I'm not going to explain it to you. Ask your father and the newspaper will fly out of his hand. Ask your mom and she'll have no idea what you're talking about. If she does, give her my number. There's twenty bands, the most famous Man or Astroman?, Six Finger Satellite, Arcwelder and Harvey Milk. Most of this is trendy college alternative that's extremely hit or miss. I'm not that open minded. Man or Astro-Man? Are great but there's too much spacey instrumental bulls--t going on here. Maybe I don't take the right drugs or sumfin.

Joe King Presents: More Bounce To The Ounce - (comp CD review) (Lookout!): Some of you hate power pop punk. Maybe all you can think of is Green Day on MTV and you have to force back a healthy puke. I don't blame you, but power pop punk is one of punk's cornerstones, a gift to the world from the Ramones. Joe King is the leader of The Queers, a band in love with The Beach Boys. This two CD set is a follow-up to Ben Weasel's punk comp Punk USA (Lookout #77) and it's great. There's lots of power pop punk but also old California HC in the style of Black Flag and the Angry Samoans. Many of my favorites are here: Cub (sounding hardcore before they broke up), The Parasites (doing a cover of The Queer's "Day Dreaming"), The Lillingtons (who in each song find a great hook and beat it to death), The Queers (covering The Who's "The Kids Are Alright" and once more attacking those darn hippies), The Muffs (covering Elvis Costello's "No Action" quite nicely), The Groovie Ghoulies (great live band), The Mr. T. Experience (recapturing some of their old tunefullness), Cletus (covering The Queer's ultra-classic "Granola Head"), Sinkhole (covering the Angry Samoan's "Gas Chamber") and the Cretins ("Jenny"). 22 bands - 39 songs. It's not all covers, but I mention them here for curiosity value. If you spike your hair and polish your Docs every day you probably don't need this, but if you want to dance and laugh the night away this is for you all the way.

MTV's Most Unwanted - New Left Records Compilation (comp CD review): Why a punk should care about MTV is beyond me. This 29 band/29 song comp CD was a few bucks, like it should be! Nobody's doing me a favor by having me shell out $14 for bands I've never heard before. These things are advertising and should be affordable. It’s a D.I.Y. effort "put together by the bands for the bands", most of them SoCal punk and ska bands from the SoCal region, so you have more of a melodic feel than you would from a New York area comp. In general this is a good collection, even though the youth and inexperience of some of the bands unshines through, especially on ska numbers whose syncopations are hard to master. If you live for all-ages shows this comp is for you. If you're an old geez like me it's nice to know what the little bastards are up to. Some bands are: The Excrements, Carter Peace Mission, Kloyster, The Skammunists, Best Buy and Gimp.

MTV's Most Unwanted II (comp CD review) (New Left): You can tell a lot about a local scene from the comps that come out of them. Comps usually adhere to a few genres (if even that) so the picture’s always incomplete, but comps are still a great indicator of the local action. The existence of comps are proof of positive involvement on the part of bands and local labels. So how's the all-ages scene look here in San Diego? Pretty good, it seems. The big influence now seems to be, for better or worse, Blink 182. Better in the output of fun and tight power pop, and worse in the celebration of all types of what passes for suburban obnoxiousness.

Ska is still popular, with swing creeping in where ska once ruled. The thing with ska is that to be taken seriously it has to be done well. It's trendy to hate ska, and if you give people any legitimate excuse to yell "Sucks!" they surely will. The Blisters fall on their faces with "Jenna's Big Jeans", about a girl named Jenna who wears baggy pants. I hope this got the lead singer laid so he can change the lyrics to something less dumb. The best songs are grouped up front, and in general this is a nice collection of 28 songs from what looks like the healthy local scene here in San Diego.

Here's my beef with the name of the comp, MTV's Most Unwanted. What does MTV have to do with punk? Nothing. It shouldn't even exist in the hearts and minds of punks. Do you want to see punk bands filming videos? Do you think the world would turn punk if more people were exposed to Bad Religion and NOFX? Do you want to live in a world where every numbnut listens to what you do? Of course not, because you listen to punk to be different (snicker snort chortle).

Physical Fatness - Fat Music Vol. III (comp CD review) (Fat Wreck Chords): I've been harsh towards Fat Wreck Chords bands. The label is ok but for too long their roster was crammed with mediocre NOFX and Bad Religion wannabees who strive for nothing beyond the glories of the all-ages show. If the kids want childish ditties with pre-programmed mosh bits, bless their rotten little hearts. They pump good mommy and daddy cash into the scene, and who am I to dictate to a zillion teenagers what they should like anyway? Kids like sugary cereal and bands like Good Riddance, Lagwagon and Hi-Standard who have this thing for a constant slapping of the drums. God bless the kids and their little partly shaved heads.

On the plus side Fat's been releasing stuff by great bands like Snuff, the Swingin' Utters and the Dickies. Fat's other label, Honest Don's, put's out music by Chixdiggit, the Teen Idols and the Riverdales. This sampler CD contains enough for both camps, and it's only $3.98.

Pogo Attack - Compilation (LP review) (Pogo Punk Records): Five bucks, twelve bands, 24 songs - oi such a deal! The cover is coated paper and folds out into a DIY band info page. These bands are mostly from NYC and comprise the cream of the Spirit of '77 revival seen on any street corner in lower Manhattan. Dyed mohawks, leather and spikes, shaved heads and boots and plaid. The '77 revival is really a mix of '79-'82 UK punk, a little oi and a bit of Italian thrash punk. Listen to the UK Subs, D.O.A., Raw Power, The Anti -Nowhere League and The Exploited if you want to find the roots of the new '77. All the big names are included: Blanks 77, The Wretched Ones, The Casualties and The Pist. If you're into this you won't find a better deal anywhere. Just please don't call this oi. Oi-kay, boy-o?

POP O.D. - The Songs of Iggy Pop (comp CD review) (Static Records): Iggy Pop is an imminently likeable, talented and historical figure. Part icon, part myth, part commodity - Igyg is on everyone's list of what's cool, from poets to punks to used record store Beatniks to art farts ("His name is 'POP'! How Warholian!!"). His story is one of rock n' roll recklessness that brought him to the edge and back of both death and insanity. At the same time he's a survivor and a suicidal maniac in the name of living each night like it's your last. He's what Jim Morrison would have been if Mr. Pretty wasn't ultimately a useless hippie. So what if Iggy's output has been at the mercy and talents of those around him? So what if his catalog of solo albums isn't all that great? It's Iggy! The man who rolled around in broken glass on stage. The man who may not even be aware he's pulled down his pants so Little Iggy can wave to the crowd. It's Iggy, man, don't you get it?! Iggy!!

Detroit's own Static Records put out POP O.D. - The Songs of Iggy Pop as a culturally mandatory tribute to the Motor City's most famous bastard child. It's also a clever way of highlighting the eclectic talent of the local music scene, like the promo says, "From Pop to Rap, Noise to Ambient, Industrial to Spoken-Word." This project is like 1993's Du Huskers - The Twin Cities Replay Zen Arcade, which is well worth finding.

All the good stuff's here, from "Search & Destroy" played as hard glam to "Raw Power" as death jazz. The effort and talent involved in these covers are awe inspiring. Any fuggknuckle can thrash out a hardcore version of "I Wanna Be Your Dog". It doesn't take much ingenuity to throw your instruments down a flight of stairs and record it as Princess Dragon-Mom does on "Real Cool Time", but it's a revelation to hear "I'm Bored" on acoustic guitar as a beatnik protest song. My tolerance for anything disco or rap is less than zero [uncalled for E. Costello reference] but I know it takes time and skill to transform a Stooges thrash classic into sleep-inducing ambient. Is that a backhanded compliment? No, that would be more like "That shirt makes you look a lot less obese."

A big hats off to Sue Static of Static Records for enduring the logistical nightmare of putting this together. No scene can suck with a Sue Summers or two on the job. You too can be a or even the Sue Summers of your local scene. Visit Static Records at http://www.staticrecords.com, and ask Sue how you can be Sue too, even a boy named Sue [uncalled for Johnny Cash reference].

Here's the bands on the comp: Agent 009 with Red September, Twitch, Red September, Forge, Jumbo, Mog Stunt Team, SPAT!, The Lovemasters, Trash Brats, The Impaler & Cindi St. Germain, Kristiva featuring Skinhorse, Marooned, Down Boyz, Culture Bandits, Franklin Sane, The Immortal Winos Of Soul, Princess Dragon-Mom, CyberTrybe, Acoustic Terminator, Moisture, The Process, Tars Tarkas and Passenger To Nowhere.

The Power Of The Mind (comp 7" review) (Mindpower): In my never-ending quest to buy records for 49 cents and then write reviews of them, I give you a three band sampler from this Southern California label. It starts with a tune from Four (that's the band's name) that punk rocks the way they do in Chicago (so you know it's good). Pollen Art have that Gilman Street cheap drumming sound and probably know every Nils song by heart. I like it. The Splitfinger crap on the other side must be a test of some kind. Are they daring me to rip this off my turntable and break it into pieces? If I ever bang my head it will be because I've gone insane and am in an institution. Maybe I just don't know how to

Punk-O-Rama III (comp CD review) (Epitaph): Today’s all-ages bands draw from two major inspirations - the slapshticky goofiness of NOFX and the thesaurus-driven power chord punk of Bad Religion. Fat Wreck Chord sand Epitaph work the same constituency from different angles. Fat bands are the peers of snotty kids on skateboards while Epitaph bands are former snotty kids on skateboards who know the easy money is found in baggy pants filled with allowance bucks. Fat bands prefer a style one step away from lite hard rock and sing about life as a horny fifteen year old, while Epitaph bands fancy themselves intense blues rockers with worldly experience to impart on kids who should listen to them because of the dues they've paid.

The Epitaph roster is impressive, with the Dwarves (sounding unlike the Dwarves), Agnostic Front (cashing in on the latest oi revival), The New Bomb Turks, The Cramps, Rancid, (grandpa hippie) Wayne Kramer, Bad Religion, NOFX, All, The Humpers, Red Aunts and others. This affordable collection has 25 songs from 25 bands, and it’s quite a bargain.

How best to phrase this… let's see…. punk is divided into two groups - the all-ages show and the 21+ bar show. Since the average punk fan is fifteen the all-age shows generate the most interest and money. All-ages shows are day care centers for kids acting out new-found rebellion and aggression within the safety net of a bed and hot meals at home. Kids run around shows out-screaming and out-posing the competition. Which is not to say the bar scene is that much better. I'm just saying the two scenes don't mix well. I can't listen to this without putting every song in the context of the all-ages show, no matter if it's the New Bomb Turks or The Cramps. To put it crudely, any band playing a kid’s birthday party is going to come across as a kid’s band. Gosh, I'd like to be more open minded about this but I can’t. A 37 year old man at an all-ages show is going to feel and be treated like either a pervert, a narc or a bewildered parent.

Epitaph still loses points with me for stealing Ralph Record's "Buy Or Die" advertising slogan, which only makes the freak show theme of the artwork another Residents rip-off.

Punk-O-Rama 4 (comp CD review) (Epitaph): Punk's dirty little secret is that most of the money going into it comes from teenager’s allowances. For a long time Fat Mike's Fat Wreck Chords label stood next to little Timmy and Becky to take whatever money mom and dad handed them for doing chores or not getting pregnant. Recent years saw Fat take on more geezer-tastic bands like Snuff and The Muffs, while Epitaph has taken upon itself to corner the kiddie-porn, I mean kiddie-punk market, with comps such as this. It features a twelve year old on the cover. What's next, titles like "Homework Sucks" and "Zits-O-Rama"?

Epitaph is home to Bad Religion and Rancid-type bands. I like both well enough but when fifty bands jump on the bandwagon I lose interest. I admit I'm a sucker for every Ramonsey band, but there's a difference. The Ramones are fun and ultimately silly. Bad Religion pushes political theology and street punk promotes a class-based view of gang warfare. It's interesting hearing it from the originals but the next generation bands come across as unoriginal and full of attitude, but with nothing to back it up. I realize each new generation prefers to hear it from bands of their own generation, and I'm not saying kids have to run out and buy obscure records by bands long gone. What I am saying is that if you love I Against I, the most blatant Bad Religion imitators allowed by law, in three years you'll feel the way I do when you come across the 20th band who sound exactly like I Against I.

There's variety on this comp and the lyrics are generally more mature than what I remember from older Fat Wreck Chords collections. Here's the bands and assorted snide comments: Pennywise (annoying lite speed metal guitar and tough guy chanted backup singing), Pulley (Bad Religion lives!), H20, Rancid (ripping off themselves at this point), Bombshell Rocks (extra credit for using a pub rock piano), Bouncing Souls, Ten Foot Pole, All (always worth a listen),